Another "say cheese" face
Warning: this post may be a little ooey-gooey (you know, from the heart). So last night as I was headed back home from work, I had a little scare. I fly all of the time (literally, way too much). I don't really think that much about it. I have actually gotten quite comfortable flying. I wasn't ever really uncomfortable flying. Well, last night on our final approach into Myrtle Beach from Atlanta, just as we were getting close to the runway, the pilot pulled-up, and we went straight back up into the sky. Immediately, I knew that was odd. Then, I heard, what sounded like, the wheels going back up into the plane. So, I knew something wasn't right. We then circled the airport for the next 20 minutes (seemed like forever) almost repeating what I just explained. Up and down. Up and down. There was a point when it actually looked like we might have to make a water-landing in the Atlantic (no one actually said this, but we got quite close to the ocean at one point). If our little plane had TVs, I really envisioned us watching ourselves on the news, while on the plane, trying to land without wheels (i.e. Jetblue, recently). I'm not going to lie; I thought that I might actually die on a plane. Which isn't altogether unfitting since I spend more than half of my time on a plane. Either way, I started texting Adam. Yep, I got my cell phone out, used it while in the air. I didn't care about dumb rules at that point. Okay, so obviously, we landed and everything is okay. All we know is that something was wrong with our landing gear. Kudos to the pilot who got me on the beloved ground safely. I couldn't sleep last night because my heart rate was SO elevated. Now, that I tell the story, it seems more like an exciting experience, but it did not feel that way last night.
So, obviously, when we contemplate our last moments on earth, it makes you question a lot of things. Sure, I'd be okay. I'd be in heaven with my Maker. I'd say that is more than okay. But at that moment, I was begging God to let me see Harrison and Adam just one more time. All I wanted to do was take those moments back when I had my laptop or cell phone out, working, instead of spending time with my husband or son. I was disgusted that I would put my family on the back burner for work. What a horrible trade! I understand that in life, there are responsibilities that you have to deal with, and work is one of those. Anyway, today when I picked Harrison up from school, we ate lunch, as usual, and then it was time for his nap. I went to put him down, and then I decided that I just wanted to cuddle. So I laid on the bed in his room (yes, there is a bed in addition to his crib b/c we are in a furnished beach house), and he just flopped down on top of me, with monkey in hand. He actually wanted to be held. But the whole time, I was choking back tears because I was so thankful that he was holding me. So we just laid there, he went to sleep, and I just looked at him. It is different to watch an toddler fall asleep versus a baby. I don't know how to explain it. I would have stayed and probably napped too, except that he started snoring like an old man. I made a pact, right then and there, with Harrison and with God, that I would never put trivial things in front of God and my family. It isn't worth it.